It's Been a Very Good Year

It's two days before my birthday.
But, I won't have time to write this tomorrow night, because I'll celebrating with my cousins in Stevenage.

When I turned twenty, which was a difficult mental and emotional process for me, I decided to call this decade me "Roaring Twenties."  I just went back and read the post I wrote on 8 July 2011.  Reading what I wrote before knowing anything the decade would hold is special.  One of my favorite things to do is to look back on specific times in my life six months or so after they've happened.

As I look back two years later, reading that twenty year old me had no idea what my twenties would hold, I smile thinking, "If only you knew."  However, even now the same thing can be said.  I have no idea what the next eight years will hold.

However, when I turned twenty I never could have dreamed up all that has taken place.  Actually, the first year seemed a little dull--you know, school.  But, really, God was already beginning to change things about me that I thought were unchangeable.

I never thought I would want to work with a youth group.  Yet, at age twenty and a half, that's what I started doing.  God created a love within me for high school students.  Then, I found myself wanting to stay in Columbia, SC (shocker!).  An opportunity arose for me to study journalism in NYC.  Finishing the program, I didn't think journalism was for me.  After making every effort to move back to Columbia, I realized I had to stay in Virginia.  I started substitute teaching and enjoyed it.  But, I was in a rut...a post-graduation depression of sorts.  I missed my friends and my church.  J. Crew was hiring for peak season.  I obtained a job, moved to Lynchburg, and started a job that increased my customer service skills, provided me with fabulous clothes, and taught me that I cannot stand a monotonous job.  In December I evaluated my passions and loves and decided I wanted to pursue a career in even planning.  It seemed like a good time to move to England.  Then, I received a job offer as a part-time newspaper reporter.  I interviewed, was offered the job, and after thinking about it, called and said I would like it if they were still offering.  The message I received was not, "Great, glad to have you."  It was, "There is an event Sunday, can you be there?"

Thus began the last almost six months.  I love writing for the newspaper.  As a result, I've met amazing people in a town that is blossoming more than it has since its railroad days.  I began substitute teaching again.  One fateful job pushed me through the door at the high school to really get to know the students.  I am forever thankful for that.  God has given me a high school full of amazing students to get to know.  Spending time with them, laughing with them, teaching them, even when they make me blush, is a highlight in my life.  Because we live in a small community, I love getting to know them out of school, as well.  Like the pageant.

Now that school is finished, I am working as tennis assistant to the tennis pro at our county's resort.  Actually, I worked two days and then left for England.  But, I'll be back next week.

Looking back on the past year, because most of what I've shared happened in that span of time, I am overwhelmed with God's presence in my life.  The year has had its tough times.  Graduation from college brings a lot of emotions that I didn't expect. But, God is patient, "...for He knows how we are formed, He remembers that we are dust..."

I am blessed with three jobs that I absolutely love, a community in which I love becoming more involved, and  a patient God who teaches me gradually.  Life is a grand adventure full of joy, happiness, sorrow, pain, and love.

Here is to being 22!

When There Are No Words...There Are Words

Photo by K.L.R.

Sometimes there are no words.

But, when I wonder how to passionately express my emotions---I can only think of journaling.

Words.

I love words.

I love watching others play their music with deep fervor and passion--and often I wish I could.

But, that is not my gifting.

Words.

That is where I find solace.

Thoughts.

Over and over I am given a greater understanding of the circumstance on which I ponder.

Nature.

I am in awe of the Creator.

Rest In God: An Idea Now Reality

I'm learning to rely on Jesus in a new way.

When my emotions and mind are going crazy and peace seems miles away,
all I can do is pray.
Peace follows.
Not peace in the sense that everything is fixed,
but a peace that God knows, and in that I can rest.
It is comforting belonging to an omniscient Father.
He holds the world.
And, yet he cares about my heartaches.

He gives sleep to those who need rest.

The Original YOLO: Ecclesiastes

Ecclesiastes 3:11

“He has made everything beautiful in its time.  He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end."

May 1.
Where did April go?
I was looking at the date on the board yesterday and thought to myself, "Is it April?  Surely it's only March 30?  No, that was Easter weekend.  It's really almost May."

Just over a month ago, snow was on the ground.
The weather still hasn't realized it's spring, although the leafiness on the trees is slowly creeping up the mountain.

I'm one of those people who loves life.  Even when it is dark, gloomy, and difficult, with perspective, I love the moments where I find joy.

Perspective is a beautiful (and relieving) thing.

I've been reading Ecclesiastes sporadically since last Wednesday.
That book provides perspective on life.
It puts life in a light that many of us forget.

Life is short.
Our time to fulfill God's call on our life is limited.
Life is beautiful.
Man is evil from birth (we are all subject to sin...and that terrible thing that stranger did...it could be me).
The world moves forward.
When we're dead, we'll be forgotten.
"A good name is better than fine perfume..." (Ecc. 7:1a)
All of mankind is drawn to thoughts of eternity...but our minds cannot fathom it.

It ends with...
"...Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.  For God will bring every deed into judgement, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil." Ecc. 12:13b-14

Some of Ecclesiastes is depressing.  But, when looked at as a whole (perspective!), it shows the beauty of life.  The ups, the downs, and what a gift it is to live.

People who are constantly looking to get to Heaven frustrate me.  I like living.  I'm not ready to die and go to Heaven.  Yes, I have my moments.  When I'm overwhelmed with life, the sadness in the world, or a circumstance gets to me, thinking of being with Jesus is comforting.

But, God created me.  He gave me a life to live.  He has plans for me and a calling for me to fulfill.  How can I bring Him glory?  I'm not sure.  But, I'm beginning to have a little more than an inkling.  It's exciting.

The phrase "YOLO" is used to encourage poor decisions among young (and old) people.
It's true, you only live once.
Don't waste that life.
You don't want that "YOLO" decision to land you in a downward spiral that may take years to come out of (if you ever do).
If you want to live by the YOLO mantra, take it to do exciting things.  Have adventures.  Challenge yourself.  Live fully.
Just remember who gave you this life.

An Ecclesiastes Moment

Photo by K.L.R.

If you've been reading for a while, you have probably seen me mention my amazing church in Columbia.  I wrote earlier in the week that the pain of missing the church seemed to have passed.  There was a long time during the summer and fall where I missed it so greatly, it was hard to attend anywhere else.

Today I've been a little more emotional than usual.  A lot is on my mind, and when something is on my mind I tend to stew on it.  Weirdly, I like stewing...even if it makes me miserable.

Since graduating from college I have been trying to learn how to operate and have a relationship with God in this new stage of life.  It is difficult, especially knowing the closest thing to a true church community I've known is five and a half hours away.  And, I'm not going to be a regular attendee, probably, ever again.

Tonight, a professor from my Alma Mater, who is the Lay Pastor of the Music and Arts at my church, posted a song he recorded.  This song is one we sing at church.  As I listened to it, the cry I've been needing came.  It is hard to have something as beautiful as a church community taken away.

I think it is time to read Ecclesiastes again.




You can purchase and download O God, Eternal Light, performed by Dr. Rod Lewis, here.

Letter from Youcef Nadarkhani

Do you remember when I wrote about Iranian pastor Youcef Nadarkhani being released from prison?  If not, please read about it.  It is truly an incredible story of God's grace and faithfulness.

Today my mom sent me the link to a letter he wrote to thank all the people around the globe who prayed for him and fought for him to be free.  I am copying his letter below.  But, to read the article and the letter, go to this link.

After reading his letter, I felt like I have been a part of something bigger, like the Christians in the New Testament.  I joined with the body of believers around the globe praying for a fellow Christian to either be released or to stand strong and not recant his belief in Jesus Christ.  I am thankful for his freedom.  I am thankful for his testimony that has been seen around the world.  It makes me realize how easy it is to be a Christian in the USA.  Yes, there is persecution, and it can be difficult.  But, we can't be imprisoned for what we believe.

After you have read this letter, I would love to hear your thoughts.  What do you think and feel about the story of Pastor Nadarkhani?

Salaam! (Peace be upon you!)

I glorify and give grace to the Lord with all my heart. I am grateful for all the blessings that He gave me during my whole life. I am especially grateful for His goodness and divine protection that characterized the time of my detention.

I also want to express my gratitude towards those who, all around the world, have worked for my cause, or should I say the cause that I defend. I want to express my gratitude to all of those who have supported me, openly or in complete secrecy. You are all very dear to my heart. May the Lord bless you and give you His perfect and sovereign Grace.

Indeed I have been put to the test, the test of faith which is, according to the Scriptures “more precious than perishable gold.” But I have never felt loneliness, I was all the time aware of the fact that it wasn’t a solitary battle, for I have felt all the energy and support of those who obeyed their conscience and fought for the promotion of the justice and the rights of all human beings. Thanks to these efforts, I have now the enormous joy to be by my wonderful wife and my children. I am grateful for these people through whom God has been working. All of this is very encouraging.

During that period, I had the opportunity to experience in a marvelous way the Scripture that says: “Indeed, as the sufferings of Christ abound for us, our encouragement abound through Christ.” He has comforted my family and has given them the means to face that difficult situation. In His Grace, He provided for their spiritual and material needs, taking away from me a heavy weight.

The Lord has wonderfully provided through the trial, allowing me to face the challenges that were in front of me. As the Scriptures says, “He will not allow us to be tested beyond our strength….”

Despite the fact that I have been found guilty of apostasy according to a certain reading of the Shar’ia, I am grateful that He gave the leaders of the country, the wisdom to break that judgment taking into account other facts of that same Shar’ia. It is obvious that the defenders of the Iranian right and the legal experts have made an important effort to enforce the law and the right. I want to thank those who have defended the right until the end.

I am happy to live in a time where we can take a critical and constructive look to the past. This has allowed the writing of universal texts aiming at the promotion of the rights of man. Today, we are debtors of these efforts provided by dear people who have worked for the respect of human dignity and have passed on to us these universal significant texts.

I am also debtor of those who have faithfully passed on the Word of God, that very Word who makes us heirs of God.

Before ending, I want to express a prayer for the establishment of an unending and universal peace, so that the will of the Father be done on earth as it is in heaven. Indeed, everything passes, but the Word of God, source of all peace, will last eternally.

May the grace and mercy of God be multiplied to you. Amen!

Youcef Nadarkhani
8 September 2012 

Freedom in Christ; Freedom from Imprisonment

Almost a year ago I wrote about an Iranian pastor, Youcef Nadarkhani, held captive for refusal to recant his Christian beliefs.  I began praying for his release and ability to stand strong.  I asked you all to pray for him.  Nadarkhani's case became known throughout the world as organizations and countries entreated Iran to free him.

Nadarkhani has a family; a wife and two sons.  His wife was imprisoned for a time and then released.  No one knew whether Nadarkhani would see freedom again.  Last October (I think) rumors began to circulate that he had been executed, martyred for his faith in Jesus Christ.  Thankfully it was not true.

Today I saw an article posted on Facebook saying Pastor Youcef Nadarkhani is a free man.  His sentence was changed, thus causing his sentence to be set at three years.  The three years have been fulfilled, and he is home.

I rejoice at prayers answered, the Gospel being shared because of this man's imprisonment, and the glory that God has received.  I am thankful Pastor Youcef did not recant.  He stood strong and honored God.  I believe God gave him the strength to withstand the persecution, strength that Christians who live in hostile nations ask people to pray they will have.  They do not ask for persecution to cease, only that they will be true to Christ and not bow to the governmental powers' demands that they deny Jesus Christ.

We may never know the extent of the impact this man's testimony will have on the world.  But, God does, and He is using it for His glory.

To God Be the Glory!

Thoughts on Martyrdom

Martyrdom has been on my mind a great deal as of late.  I am in Acts this semester, a class devoted to studying the book of Acts.  In chapter 7, at the end, Stephen is martyred.  The first known Christian martyr.  Then, a few days ago I heard of the pastor in Iran who is being held prisoner for not recanting his Christian faith.  This has been really weighing on me since yesterday.  I think relatively often about what it would be like to be persecuted for my faith.  Would I be able to withstand harsh persecution or would I crumble beneath the pressure? 

I feel so weak when I think of Christians in parts of the world that are breaking the laws of their countries by being Christians and meeting together with other believers.  What if it suddenly became illegal to be a Christian in the United States?  How would the church react?  What would Christians do and how many would be faithful?

Anyway, please be in prayer for Pastor Youcef Nadarkhani, his family, and the Iranian Christians that they would find rest in God during this very difficult time...that will become all the harder if he is executed.  He is someone's son, someone's husband, and someone's father.